Monday, November 29, 2010

what the fuck am i doing.

jackie blogged at 11:27 PM

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

i hate it when someone's mad at you but doesn't tell you and gives all those snide and bitchy remarks and when you start to get that vibe and start being less chummy with that person, they suddenly become paranoid and come running back. WTF.

jackie blogged at 7:59 AM

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Promos are OVER!!!
YAYEYEEEE!!!
I'm so happy, but i feel more stressed before than after... haha...
Anyway, I think God is really good! Results are all up to him. I hope I do well, but whatever the results, to God be the Glory :D

haix...
i'm feeling all mixed up inside.
I really hate fake people and shallow friendships...
I hate snide remarks and insults.
I hate people who use other people just so they don't look lonely, sad, miserable and pathetic, cos that's what you are...
You make me want to puke...

jackie blogged at 9:24 AM

Sunday, August 1, 2010

jackie blogged at 4:41 AM

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Internal conflict. That's me. I don't know if it's the fact that I'm still not used to the culture here... or maybe it is. i didn't use to be this way. i used to be contented and happy with being alone. but now, i feel so awkward and conscious whenever i'm alone):
Maybe i'm thinking too much. i mean, Jesus was like that, all alone and condemned in the world that He gave His life for... So if He can do it, I can too as i draw strength from God. YEP!

jackie blogged at 6:59 AM

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Went to Speech Day on Friday. OMGSH! I really love SMSS!!! )): It really hit me how much I've grown, learned, and changed in St.Marg's in 10 years. I really treasure all the friendships and bonds forged. It's really like a family (:
One thing I'll take away is actually the School Hymn and School Song! They're both speak of our past, present, and future, but most of all, they're meaningful and speak of God's relevance in our school! I just feel so proud singing them :D

School Song

In these sound walls, a goodly learning frame
Who here abide true kindliness impart
With steadfast love, devotion firm inflame
The fire that waits in every heart

For Charity, Patience, Devotion
Let's be known
These qualities St. Margaret's shown
On which our school has grown

We learn to serve our God, our State, our School
In service free for neighbour, home and friend
So may we keep the all embracing rule
In care for all our lives to spend

When life brings pain, when trials us defy
Our faith, our hope, our discipline require
Us to withstand, respond with spirit high
St. Margaret's shall again inspire.


School Hymn

Our Father, by whose servants
Our school was built of old,
Whose hand hath crowned her children,
With blessings manifold;
For thine unfailing mercies;
Far strewn along our way;
With all who passed before us,
We praise Thy name today.

The changeful years unresting,
Their silent course have sped,
New comrades ever bringing,
In comrades' steps to tread;
And some are long forgotten,
Long spent their hopes and fears;
Safe rest they in Thy keeping,
Who changest not with years.

They reap not where they laboured,
We reap what they have sown;
Our harvest may be garnered,
By ages yet unknown;
The days of old have dowered us
With gifts beyond all praise,
Our Father, make us faithful;
To serve and love always.

Before us and beside us,
Still holden in Thy hand,
A cloud of unseen witness,
Our elder comrade stand;
One family unbroken;
We join with one acclaim,
One heart one voice uplifting,
To glorify Thy name.

I'll remember all the tears and laughter and the moments in which the way we behave make us truly and uniquely St.Marg's girls. I'll remember the sweat and tears in track in SMPS, all the childish quarrels, the cold jokes, the lame nicknames, the hot afternoons spent in Mt. Emily Park, the slides, see-saws, the trainings, the huge spiders, the weeds which we had to pluck, the red seeds picked and kept, the hill which we climbed everyday, the same hill which we jogged down talking about Runescape and the sprints up and around, the potato and sausage, the drink-stall auntie, Ms Low, laoshis and so many others!!!
In SMSS, all the a-little-bit-more mature conversations, the still-childish talks about each others crushes, the teacher dramas, the weird encounters with bunks and butches, the after-school mingling and sometimes gossiping, the jamming sessions, the awkward and accidental encounters with seniors, the letter-writings (!!!), the general dislike for auntie phyllis, the love for cheese tofu (!!!), the trips to cluny park, madrina pizza (!!!), lame pranks and tears, the late-night study dates, bullying junior prefects and intimidating them with our oh-so-scary glares, the chinese lessons and movies, sly and sarcastic remarks, the non-existent singing, the cute and funny teachers, the stern teachers, my history group, my seat at the back of the class in sec3, the class gatherings and the oh-so-successful lighting of charcoal at the BBQs, the cam-whoring, the quiet of the mornings, the scramble before tests and whines after them, the day we all went home cos the pipe was busted, the movie dates, how we'll laugh at anything, aHHH there's so many things I'll miss!!! It's like we're all connected and all the same, yet so different! I guess what I'll miss most is the comfort and love )):

jackie blogged at 3:38 AM

Friday, June 25, 2010

Hey(: I know it's been a real roller coaster ride for us. We're both intense in some ways and in other ways, just plain retarded. I'd be lying if I said I didn't think of you since it all happened. As much as I tried to deny it, most of my unforgettable memories and good times in St.Marg's was spent with you. You were the only one in many years that I actually felt a connection with. I really felt I had a bestfriend in you. She didn't even come close to measuring up, but you did. I don't know if you believe me, but those times that we did simple things such as walking to the bustop from starbucks at night in the middle of the road or even just talking about things, they really had an impact on me. For once I felt there was someone I could open up more to.
Then things happened. I don't know specifically, but I think it all happened when she and I patched things up. I'm sorry if you felt insecure in any way or hurt if I'd neglected you, it felt as if you weren't happy that she and I were friends again.
Then Pattawan came back, and you started telling me all the plans and stuff you and her were going to do together like go to the same JC and stuff, - things you'd say you'd do with me, and I was hurt. Then I heard about what you told her (the first "her") behind my back when she and I weren't talking, and I felt as if I was stabbed in the back. So I pulled the wall back up between us and shut you out. I was so mad, I couldn't believe you'd do that to me.
But now, it's all over. Thanks for doing what you did. That was brave and kind of you. In many ways, I look up to you. I'm sorry for all the times I've been cold to you. I'm sorry for the times I've listen to others instead of hearing your side of the story. I'm sorry for dumping you for other friends like Dorcas and Joyce. I'm sorry for hurting you the way I did, I had no right. I'm sorry for the times I didn't tell you how much I appreciated you. I'm sorry for the times I didn't tell you you made a difference in my life. I'm sorry it turned out like this.
And yes, I hope we can still be friends and put all the shit behind us...

jackie blogged at 5:29 AM